Tag Archives: humor

Review of the “The Ride- London to Beijing”

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Looking for a good motorcycle documentary then check out “The Ride- London to Beijing”. The series follows a novice group of riders who struggle to endure an epic motor bike journey from Western Europe to Northern China. The greenhorn riders are led by a Guinness World Record Endurance Rider, Kevin Sanders. The expedition is filled with adventure, challenges, and unforgettable landscape and is expertly edited and narrated. The 12-week story keeps one engaged throughout the series and leaves the viewer looking for more. The series could have used a bit more character development but that really is not the intended purpose of this kind of production. At the end of the day, the documentary gave insight into a challenging adventure and what it takes to accomplish such an exploit. I enjoyed this series a bit better than “The Long Way Round” because if feels more real and raw then the two-wheeled adventures of Ewan McGregor and his pal Charley Boorman.
The leader of this expedition, Kevin Sanders just seems to be the type of individual anyone would follow and has an ability to weight risk verses reward options that manage successes. It takes guts to lead a ramble of rookie riders through the terrain that was overcome by the group. I have been riding for 18 years and I would have been bloody petrified to take on some of the challenges that the riders accomplished.
They travel some hairy, muddy terrain on heavy expensive BMW Adventure Tour Motorcycles. One of these days, I would like to see a motorcycle documentary use a few inexpensive lighter weight duel sport cycles to achieve their objectives. I get that the BMW is a solid reliable tough bike to get the job done but is it more dependable then let’s say a Suzuki DR-Z 400? Even better, use a Royal Enfield Himalayan to do the job. One can buy 4 Himalayan’s at the price of a new BMW 1200 GS and they are easier to repair given their more simplistic technology. I am not saying the Royal Enfield is a better bike then the coveted BMW Adventure Tour King, but I do believe both can get you to the same places at much different price points. One may get you there much slower than the other, but it will arrive just the same.
At the end of the day, “The Ride- London to Beijing” is a fun watch which will help motivate you to start planning your next epic adventure. The series is not overly long which is great for those who have commitment issues. In fact, when it ended, I was left yearning for more.

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Random Sites from the Forest

So I have been riding a ton in the back country on National Forest Roads.  Such awesome rides can be found in the dark green wilderness.   No doubt these rides are great and I love some of the strange random sites I have seen. One such site was during a pre-dawn ride in the back country where I came across a car hanging out on the side of the road (the car was actually hanging off a big ledge on the side of the road).  It was kind of crazy and reminded me of a scene from a horror movie.  To this day, I am not sure why that car was in the middle of the forest.  Here is the photo below:

Car hanging off drop off


“Hold the Ground at All Hazards”- The Hill Called Little Round Top

Panoramic

Little Round Top is hallowed ground; it’s a place where courage, death, and valor met on a bloody hill. It’s a place where the extreme heroic actions of a few, helped extend the reach of freedom for those in bondage. Union men defended that small knoll and their sacrifice literally saved a young nation. Little Round Top served as the last Southern anchor point of the Union Army on the Second Day of the Battle of Gettysburg. If the defending soldiers were overwhelmed by the Confederate forces at this critical location, then the Union Armies Left Flank would fall. The Confederates would then gain the high ground and like dominoes, the Union Army would have toppled upon its self. If the Union Army was routed at Gettysburg in the Northern State of Pennsylvania, Confederate General Robert Lee would be free to march his Army south uncontested and force President Lincoln to capitulate to the Confederate Cause.
On the early morning of July 2, 1863, the high ground on the Union Force’s far left flank laid undefended from an impending Confederate attack. Without orders and on his own initiative, Union Colonel Strong Vincent, knowing the vital importance of the position ordered his Third Brigade to occupy and defend the high ground at a small hill called Little Round Top. The order to secure this vital position was given to the 20th Maine Volunteers Commanded by Colonel Joshua Chamberlain. Only a year previous, Colonel Chamberlain was a Professor of Rhetoric at Bowdoin College in Maine. He spoke more than 8 languages fluently but had little military experience and only became the Commander of the Infantry Company a month previously. Colonel Chamberlain was given the order from Colonel Strong Vincent to, “hold the ground at all hazards”. Within minutes of taking their positions on that little rocky hill, the 20th Maine was attacked by the 15th Alabama, Commanded by Colonel William Oates. Multiple attacks by the Confederates were thrown up that hill and were repulsed by the Union Troops. After each attack, the Confederates shifted their forces to flank and overwhelm the 20th Maine. After many assaults on their position, Union Forces found themselves stretched thin and without ammunition to defend against another attack. Colonel Chamberlain’s orders were clear, there was to be no surrender. Without hope of reinforcements, little ammunition nor men to hold the line, the situation was dire. At that moment, the Professor from Bowdoin College gave the order to those left in his Command to equip bayonets. With no other options available, Colonel Joshua Chamberlain issued the order to attack down the blood drenched hill. This action served to confuse and disorient the Confederate Forces and turned the tide of the battle. The Confederate forces never recovered from the Chamberlain’s bayonet charge and were driven from the field saving the high ground and the Union’s left flank.
Colonel William Oats, Commander of the 15th Alabama Infantry who lost half his force on that gory day explained, “the dead literally covered the ground”. Union Army Colonel Strong Vincent who ordered the defense of Little Round Top was mortally wounded while rallying his men. He was promoted to General while on his death bed before succumbing to his wounds. Colonel Joshua Chamberlain survived the three-day Battle of Gettysburg and continued to lead men into battle. At the Second Battle of Petersburg, Colonel Chamberlain was severely wounded and was suspected to die of his wounds and was promoted to the rank of Brigadier General. He even out maneuvered death and survived the wound to live till age 85. After the war he served as the Governor of Maine as well as President of Bowdoin College.

The History that can still be felt at Little Round Top is palatable to the senses. Take the time to wonder the many monuments dedicated to all that fought there. My suggestion is to read the book “Killer Angeles” by Michael Shaara. Its not a long read but is informative beyond measure and written in such a way that is pure historical bliss. Reading the book will help you acclimatize yourself to the many facets of the Battle of Gettysburg and will give you additional information to help you more enjoy your visit.

 

 

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Barber Motorsports Park

Incredible Museums should be cherished and loved; Motorcycle Museums should be memorialized.  I would call  Barber Motorsports Museum a Two Wheeled Shrine of epic proportions.  Plan a trip there if feasible and make it a priority.


Test to see where you fall in the Motorcycling Obsessive Compulsive Data Metrics Scale

Are you obsessed with motorcycling?  Take the short test below to see where you fall in the Motorcycling Obsessive Compulsive Data Metrics Scale or (MOCDMS).   The test is easy to complete.  Just answer Yes or No to each question below.  At the end of the questionnaire count the number of “Yes” Answers and correspond your result to the MOCDMS Result Metric at the end of the test.

TwoTireTirade is not responsible for future symptoms and or treatments of your Motorcycling Obsessive Compulsive Disorder nor is TwoTireTirade certified by any medical or physiological organization.  The research used in the MOCDMS was not done in the conjunction with the American Psychological Association.

Please see the twelve Questions immediately below and remember to be honest in your answers.  You will only answer Yes or No to each question listed.  Falsely answering questions may lead to an inaccurate data result.

  1. Have you ever just drove your motorcycle on a major highway to weave in and out of traffic?
  1. Do you gaze at helmets for long periods of time like others do fine art?
  1. Do you know what “Farkle” Means?
  1. Do you know why Motorcyclist often have bells on their cycles?
  1. Have you debated the benefits of Leather Jackets verses Synthetic Jackets?
  1. Can you define what the “Tail of the Dragon” means?
  1. Would you rather ride in the Rain on a Motorcycle rather than be dry in a car in the same conditions?
  1. Do you know what the term “Cage” Refers to?
  1. Can you describe in general terms what the concept “Counter Steering” means?
  2. Do you believe that Lane Splitting should be legal in all 50 States?
  1. Do you know how to avoid a “Yard Shark Attack”?
  1. Does your spouse/friends/family roll their eyes whenever you bring up Motorcycling due to the fact that they are just tired of your rants on the subject?

Please tally your Yes Responses to the above questions and correspond your Results to the Data Metrics Below:

Number of Yes Responses

0 – 4 Yes Responses

No need for medication or therapy at this time.  You are not at all fascinated by the motorcycling culture and should feel perfectly secure in the fact that you’re normal.

5 – 8 Yes Responses

You have dipped your toes into the world of motorcycling but have not dived in head first.  There is hope for you to maintain your status as being part of the social norm.  It is recommended that you stay away from motorcycle oriented retail operations and other motorcycle friendly establishments to curve your future motorcycle urges.  We recommend that your refrain from adrenaline enhancing behavior which may lead to ugly thoughts of life on two wheels.

9-10 Yes Responses

You have issues and should seek immediate medical and or psychological treatment.  You have been overtaken by the Philosophy of Life on Two Wheels. It will be a long hard road to get back to a normalized life.  You constantly think of motorcycling and plan the majority of your social interactions around your motorcycling life style.  The majority of your free time is spent dwelling about future motorcycling trips and or on plans to enhance your cycle.   Motorcycling has dramatically changed your life and has affected the relationships between you and your friends and family.  You have lost productivity at work because of your dependence on motorcycling.  Motorcycling is becoming you and you are desperately in need of professional help.

11 – 12 Yes responses

You have Terminal Motorcycling Obsessive Compulsive Disorder; for you there is no hope.  At this time, your best bet is to dive head first into your obsession and let it consume you to the bitter end.  Indulge in a new bike and or buy another cycle for your collection.  Given your horrific mental condition, ride hard and ride often.  Don’t toil over needless worries and ride free.   Dream big and live bigger.  Let no one diverge you from your passion and surround yourself with others whom suffer your same affliction.  As they say, misery loves company.

This community service has been provided by TwoTireTirade.  Leave me a comment and let me know how you did on the test.

 

Dogs and Cycles

 


Love the Ride for the Pure Joy of Life and the Never Ending Dream

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I knew that it would be another tough day at the office filed with turbulence and strife.  My commute is about an hour and felt a profound satisfaction that my hectic work day would start and end on my motorcycle.  During my ride, I dwelled upon the end of winter and the beginning of a new season.

As the sun peaks over the horizon and shares its warm vibrant rays, I realize that winter has retreated north.  The scent of new life has permeated through the plains and mountains and one can almost smell the land coming alive from a winter’s desolate exile.  The rivers are more vibrant, fed by melting snow and the birds chatter among the trees in an epic devotional of the miracles of spring.   For motorcyclist living in a multifaceted climate, this time of year represents an open door to freedom which removes limitations to our ability to ride.   The warm air and gentle breeze call us from afar to find new paths to places rarely visited.

Motorcycling in spring is like waking up to find that one’s awe-inspiring fantasy has indeed become a reality.  Seize the moment and ride.  Find a new adventure, research the wonders of history in your backyard, visit a friend long-lost, and cherish the majestic environment that only spring can display.  We are our own leading restraint in finding happiness in this world; don’t let any obstacle get in your way.   Now is the time to leave the chaos of life behind and chase smiles and grins on black top covered dreams.

We live a life of risk and rewards.  Every day may be the last day but we are always planning for tomorrow.  It’s a life of balance and one must never lose touch with rationale thought but an occasional jaunt living on the edge builds character.  Find time to live and breathe the fresh air of an uncluttered mind.  Focus on the Ride and let the road be your long-lost muse.

No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn” –  Hal Borland

happiness


American Travesty Tour, Research before the Ride- Sand Creek Massacre and the Granada War Relocation Center

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I am in the process of planning a ride through Southeast Colorado which I am calling the American Travesty Tour.  I try to research the historical significance of places that I plan on visiting on my motorcycle.  I find that a bit of inquiry before the trip, makes the sites I see more vibrant and impactful.   Planning this ride really made me reflect upon the concept of the duel Characteristic of Man.  The notion that an individual can be both good and evil is not all that easy to swallow until one really dwells upon the deep unending depth of an individual’s soul.  Were all capable of doing wondrous positive things as well as committing horrific acts of evil.  What is an even more bazaar is that individuals often can do these things in conjunction with one another.  Researching the historical significance of the Sand Creek Massacre and the Granada War Relocation Center in Southeast Colorado put into perspective the wrongs that my own country has committed.  These are not the only sins that burden my own cultural identity but give me a sense of what we are all capable of doing if we do not live with an ethical and spiritual conscious.  As a combat veteran, I can tell you that I am proud to be an American but one also must keep their hearts open to learning opportunities that we can learn from the past.

On November 29th 1864, America lost its moral compass when a force of Colorado US Volunteer Calvary under the command of US Army Colonel John Chivington attacked a peaceful village of Cheyenne and Arapaho Native Americans.  The encampment was filled with mostly women and children, since the men were out hunting food for the upcoming winter. The band of Indians were requested to move to the Sand Creek area of Southeast Colorado and were guaranteed their safety by the American Government.    In their village flew an American Flag along with a White Flag underneath the stars and stripes which was raised by the tribe to show their peaceful nature.  Most adult Cheyenne and Arapaho men in the encampment were either sick or too old to attend the hunt.  There is no real accurate causality list but it is safe to report that more than 100 Arapaho and Cheyenne Native Americans were killed, mostly women and children.  This attack became known as the Sand Creek Massacre.  This blood bath lead to further violence throughout the region when countless reprisals were made against white settlers in response to the Sand Creek Massacre by Native American Warriors.     It’s a classic sad tale of hate begetting hate.   Not all the military personal under Colonel Chivington participated in the massacre.  Captain Soule who was in charge of Company D of the 1st Colorado Calvary ordered his men to stand down and did not attack when given the charge orders.  Captain Soule latter testified against Colonel Chivington.  On April 23, 1865 Silas Soule was murdered in Denver, CO while on duty as a Provost Marshal.  Evidence suggests that his untimely death was payback for his eye witness testimony against Colonel Chivington.

Granada War Relocation Center, also known Camp Amache was a Japanese Relocation Camp located just outside Granada, CO in Southeast Colorado.  In the spring of 1942, Japanese Americans were rounded up and forced from their homes and made to move to one of ten such Japanese Relocation Camps.  Individuals were only allowed to bring one bag to the relocation centers and were forced to sell their valuables and property including pets and livestock before getting forced out of their homes.  It’s hard to fathom such fear and hate which lead to such an abysmal act.  While their family members were stuck in War Re-Location Camps, Japanese Americans were fighting the fascists in Europe.  The US Army 442nd Regiment was made up of mostly men of Japanese ancestry and was the most decorated unit for its size and length of service in the history of American Warfare.  The 442nd Infantry Regiment earned 9486 Purple Hearts and was awarded eight Presidential Unit Citations.  Their motto was “Go for Broke” and they lived up to that creed with twenty-one of their members being awarded the Medal of Honor.

I never have posted my pre-ride research before an upcoming ride but felt so affected by what I learned that I wanted to put in words and share.  I plan on taking this journey in the next few months and will hopefully be able to share more information.

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