We All Could Have More Proud Moments

Horstail Falls in Yosemite National Park


As I dwell on my life I can ponder a collection of emotions and experiences.  Some are positive and others are negative.  There are many actions I wish I could take back.  Unfortunately this is impossible but I can learn from the experience and become a better person from it.  I have learned that focusing on the ills of the past only makes for more ugliness.  I really don’t dwell on my accomplishments either.   I have worked in the corporate conglomerate machine long enough to know that you’re only as good as what you accomplished today.  In other words, the past has no bearing on your self-worth today.  It’s the “What Have You Done For me Lately” corporate policy.  There are times when one must reflect upon the past but the trick is not letting yourself get stuck there.

I have been in a nostalgic mood of late and dwelled upon what I was most proud of.  It was neither all that profound nor recent.  I was 10 and driving home on a school bus.  There was a boy of 8 named Neil who sat a few seats behind me.  He always sat alone.  His clothing was rather old and kind of smelled like an old dirty wash cloth.  There were two boys, Shane and Lee making fun of Neil as we rode the bus home.  On that day I sat with Neil and told Shane and Lee to leave him alone.  I remember they said, “as soon as you get off the bus, we will tease him some more”.  I sat with Neil for the rest of the week then he just disappeared.  I never did find out what happened to him and can only hope the best for him.  That moment has left a genuine footprint on my soul and has shaped my entire persona.  I remember that day on the bus like it was yesterday.  The fear I felt prior to speaking with Shane and Lee was more then I felt when bombs and bullets were flying around me in Iraq.  It was genuine fear but the emotion of knowing I made a difference in a life of another was truly pure joy.  I guess that I needed to reflect on that experience.  It’s been a while since I have done something that I can be truly proud of and need to do better with the time I have when I have the capability to make a difference.  I have been complacent and need to step up and endeavor to make a difference.  I need to find that man who I once was when I was that 10 year old boy.  Onward towards positive actions!


About twotiretirade

Keeping the faith of fanatics who feel fired up for anything motorcycles. It’s all about the journey and the philosophy of riding on two wheels. Let’s bring alive the truly unique culture of motorcycling and never let the ride leave the fibers of our being. View all posts by twotiretirade

One response to “We All Could Have More Proud Moments

  • eamallory

    I was 25 waiting tables, direction-less sitting on a park bench with a hang over thinking I need to be doing something else. The park bench that I was sitting on was 20 feet and 8 years from a spot where once I defended a kid against Nazi Skinheads. I wondered what happened to that guy? (The kid I defended is now a police officer) I decided to find the me that had the gumption to make decisions like that.
    So often we get mired in the mediocrity of the daily life we forget what really matters. The office is a place where stand up personalities can be penalized if they are not tempered, that is a part of the game. Then the fear sets in: “What if I loose my job” “What if I never go anywhere” For me its been work, to make my personality work in the confines of an office. I think look for different ways to make money all the time. Life is the ride, the journey. Make it beautiful. Make it work. Know where home is.

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